We are a selfish society.

Harsh word to start off today’s post, but it’s true. We think that we are entitled to things, our pleasure & selves come before anything else, and that’s true when it comes to the truth. Let’s face it - if my first sentence offended you, then I hit the nail on the head. (Don’t get me wrong, I’m not writing this to offend anyone, but to help us reflect & draw closer to God).

When the struggles hit, especially when we feel as if it’s all falling apart, knowing what we can change, and can’t change, can make all of the difference in the world. We can’t change our past or our parents. We can’t bring back the ones we have lost, nor can we change the gifts & talents that God has given us. But when we can accept these things, we will find peace in the midst of our struggles. This is because we’ve accepted the fact over what we cannot change. But if we can’t, then we’ll make ourselves along with the people around us, miserable.

Although this may sound bleak, hear me: There really isn’t much we can change. But there something that we can: ourselves. Jeremiah wrote this when his world was beginning to unravel:

I used to be even more impatient & judgmental before I found God. Being late for something, traffic, people, … If something was interrupting "my plan" or schedule… easiest way to get me upset. I would make myself miserable. And then God showed me that things happen for a reason. I’m running late because… the people that I’m meeting up with, are as well. There’s traffic because God is protecting me from an accident. God uses people to "disrupt" my schedule because He wants me to talk to them, reminding myself of why I truly am on this planet, and not because of my schedule or plans. God took my worked-up misery and helped me see that these things are His doing, that His Hand is still in my life.

Sometimes, when things unravel, it’s because our life isn’t lining up with what God wants from us. How we react when crises hit, can help us learn on what we should really be focusing upon: Jesus.

We’ll need to reprioritize our lives God’s way, but that takes some gut-level self-evaluation.

I have a problem with "self-evaluation" because it involves ourselves.

I have used this example for years, and I have yet to find anything better:

You & I are at a bar with friends, and one of our friends is always drunk.

If you went up to them and asked them directly, "do you think you have a drinking problem?",

What do you think they’ll say? (No) But if you asked every close person in their life,

What do you think they would say? (Yes) The same applies to ourselves.

If I want to know anything about "you", you would be the last person I would ask.

Why? Because we have a highly-biased opinion when it comes to ourselves.

So with that in mind, self-evaluation is a difficult thing at times.

We’ll need to take a no-nonsense inventory of every area in our life, looking closely at every relationship in our life: God, spouse, children, family, friends, co-workers… We’ll need to look at the hurts, habits & hang-ups that may be keeping us away from what God wants for us. Seriously: Nothing in our lives can be off limits. No, this won’t be easy or painless. In all honesty, this will probably hurt. But remember that it’s alway tough to turn from sin, even when it’s tearing us down.

But there is no other way to find the healing that we are looking for. Healing without repentance will not last. When things fall apart, nothing in our lives will seem right, because we are not right with God. But again, we can’t change the things around us - only ourselves.

But when our world is falling apart, that can mean everything.