#Encouraged(AndNOT) 2018.01.22
I had a pretty good weekend… Nowadays, when people ask how I’m doing, my response has been "Life is always good… it’s just my perspective that changes and right now, I want to say that my perspective is is in line w\God! So, I’m better than I deserve!" And for the most part, that response has encouraged other. (One brother thought it was a "phony response" until I re-explained it and that helped change his perspective... but that's neither here or there) And, despite a new battle w\tennis elbow (which is seriously affecting my workouts), a bad night’s sleep Friday night, which affected me all weekend, it was still pretty awesome! Spent some time with my son Friday & Saturday, prepped a great dinner & dessert for a group date Saturday night, had a great time teaching in my church’s kid’s class Sunday morning, and spent some time w\my niece, where we saw "Paddington 2". Again, a great weekend!
A few of the memorable, encouraging moments were, a great encouragement date w\a sister… dinner, dessert & a group "Just Dance" challenge! It was memorable! And the sister ended the evening by presenting me with a well thought out gift: a much needed water bottle, a sweat towel, a journal (which I seriously needed), a mug and a wonderful card, mentioning Proverbs 3:5-6 [because she’s proud of the path that I’m currently on…]
I was even encouraged by a brother during kid’s class on Sunday… We had to walk a boy to the bathroom, and while we were waiting outside, parallel to a current conversation, he mentioned that I was the type of person who could go to a football game alone, and make friends with the people around me… I really felt encouraged by that (but then again, this brother’s incredibly encouraging so…)(but he was still awesome to say that). And to top it off, he shared how this blog still encourages & challenges him, as a disciple… *YAAAASSSSSSS*
I’ve been working on how I answer, "How are you?" nowadays. I say that because I’m the type of guy to give you a straightforward answer to this question - "this is good, this isn’t good". I have to learn how to "read" people better, to derive the ones who sincerely want to know, and the ones who say it, simply because it’s habit. Another problem I have is how I talk about the things that "aren’t great" - I can easily start off as surfacey (which is good when it comes to things that "aren’t great"), but the closer I am to the subject, the faster I can go from "talking" to "venting"… yeah, I need to carefully watch out for that. So, let me give it a try.
This weekend did have it’s "not so great" moments as well. Interactions with the ex-wife are rarely good or comforting so, I’ll move on. There is this single mom at my church whom I’ve enjoyed talking to, and have been looking to encourage her for quite some time. I’ve asked recently, only to get a "can’t make it" response - but that did not discourage me! I’d reach out via text & phone to check in on her, and every time I hinted about an encouragement date in the near future, it was met with some subtle resistance. So this Sunday, I saw her as she was picking up her child from another’s kid’s class, and I gently mentioned that 'it can be taken as ‘discouragement’ when faced with some hesitancy in trying to encourage a sister.'
Her response was "different" - body language and the face she made, simply amplified the uneasiness of her words - something along the lines of ‘I have an issue with encouragement dating" and "consider [her] encouraged by simply asking [her] out on an encouragement date". I was… discouraged.
So much so, that I had to talk to another single mom about this, just to make sure that I keeping my heart free from sin. In the end, I had texted this sister back, and focused this about "her" since I did not want to make this about "me" - something has happened, or is happening, where this sister does not want to be encouraged by me (or any other brother), but had no issue in not breaking herself free from "this" or out of her comfort zone… I simply said "Are you ok?"
Now, the response is insignificant - the point is, we are encouraged, and we are placed in moments of discouragement. I guess the big question is, "how are you going to deal with the latter?" The scripture is clear on what we should be doing:
24And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. | ||
Hebrews 10:24-25 |
Our ability in doing good isn’t a ‘head’ issue, but a ‘heart’ issue. We know what we should do, but our endurance or commitment level can easily be influenced by boredom, the human need for change, or worse yet, selfish motivation. The author of Hebrews tells us to meet together regularly & consistently as a church family. To bring things closer to home, the scripture states that we should be doing this more as "the Day" approaches.
This, of course, swim upstream of the flowing torrent of "human thinking" - While it’s true that we were made to live in a community of others, we often have a hard-coded tendency to live alone, in some form or another, because it’s a desire of the flesh. The problem with this is, we need each other. One cannot grow with God without others challenging, exhorting, and encouraging us. Let’s face it - we did things our own way, and that’s why were disciples today! It’s the confessing, and corrections that we receive that help us all to grow. It’s God’s teachings that help me to not get ticked or "write this sister off" (bc "old Cecil" would’ve in a heartbeat), but approach this with patience and compassion.
Thank God for the people He has put in our lives, and for His church. And ask Him to give you the wisdom to be with others, encouraging others, but also allow to be encouraged by others, even when our flesh desires the opposite.
